By Vicki Hughes    Posted March 18, 2013

The ability to tap into happiness and experience joy are not always whimsical accidents. It’s a practice we can all cultivate. The more people I talk to, the more I realize how misunderstood the concept of being happy is. Many people think it’s an inherent trait that a few lucky people are born with, like straight teeth or great hair.

But people are not born happy! They either receive the tools to be happy or they don’t. Some are born to parents who model happiness, but many are not. Some people find teachers  later in life, or books, movies or through music, and learn to copy their behavior.

You may have been born into an extremely unhappy environment, but here is some good news. You can learn a happier way to live! I read a great article by Terri Cole on How Not To Be Your Own Buzzkill, that you may pick up some pointers from.

Imagine a little boy whose dad played baseball in college, who almost went to the big leagues. His mom and dad bring him home from the hospital, and what theme do we see in the nursery? Baseballs! Dad ends up modeling lots of baseball-y stuff for Junior from the get go. Maybe Junior is born with the physical traits that will make him a great athlete, and maybe he isn’t. But one thing we know, Junior is going to learn lots of cool baseball tricks from his Dad, which the little boys across the street  likely won’t get from their stockbroker dad.

On the first day of T-ball, Junior may appear to be much more of a “natural” ball player than the stockbroker’s kids for one reason. He had a better teacher at an earlier age.

But guess what? This is T-Ball! This is where beginners begin! We don’t expect the midgets in jerseys to be ready to pitch for the Giants yet! It’s time to learn.

Some of you grew up without a soul to show you how to practice being happy. Some of you were shamed and criticized, or taught to feel superstitious about having good things happen.  Hell-bent On Happy is here to be T-Ball for you!

I don’t care if you get distracted in the outfield and pick dandelions, or run the bases backwards, or sit down in the dirt and cry every once in a while, because it’s too hard. It’s T-Ball. We’re here to learn and have fun, to work together towards a common goal, being happy! (If we are really lucky we will get good snacks this week, like Rice-Krispie Treats, instead of those lame celery sticks!)

Don’t be discouraged if it’s harder for you than it seems for other people. Some of us grew up with really great, functional, supportive, healthy examples. Not everyone is that blessed. But here’s a little insight. Even with great examples, mentors and teachers, those “lucky ones” still have to practice the fundamentals, still strike out, still have no-hit streaks, and sore muscles, and occasionally get tossed out of the game for getting pissy with the umpire.

Relax. It’s a game.

We’re all here to help each other to make the game worthwhile. Keep showing up, invite your friends to the ball field, and let’s have some fun.

Play ball!

Know someone who needs to get out on the field? Click “Share,” below and invite them to the game!

© Vicki Hughes 2013